Thanks for taking time to stop by and check out my lousy attempt at a website. I'm basically an aspiring stand-up comedian blah blah blah. I write everyday and am inspired by many different things. In other words, anything you say or do in my presence can and will be used against you in some of my material. Just ask my friend Kyle Isao. Yes, I'm name dropping and no, he's not famous in case you're wondering how stable I am as an adult woman who wants to achieve celebrity status.

At this point, I'd like to mention that my material is usually not very PG so if you have young children around please get them into another room asap. You never know what will come out of my mouth or what might go in. Don't judge me, you were drunk at 10am.

Anyway, my 2017 New Year's resolutions are to secure some writing gigs and to do more stand-up. I'd also like to lose weight and try to use the f word less frequently, so I think we all know where this is going! Obviously I'm going to need your help getting the word out on how great and stuff I am so please just do it and no one gets hurt. Unless you're into that type of thing, weirdo!

Xoxo Melissa